I Have No Creativity.
(Source: mylifeasamilso, via twerknugget)
(Source: jennamarblesflog, via thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg)
The Life Cycle of a Frogman (so far)
Chapter 1: I AM BORN.
I was a headstrong baby with delusions of grandeur. At first I desired to be a track star.
After that dream faded, all I wanted to be was a farting airplane.
It was not meant to be. I had the farting down, but my attempts to become an airplane were for naught.
I met a hero of mine. Baseball great Stan Musial. And I enjoyed the Animaniacs as every young person should.
I entered my freshman year of high school and lost all control over my face.
As a senior I became weird. I would dress up fancy, raise my arms in the air, and just stand in the yard for hours.
As a young adult I went through a rebellious phase, deciding hair was for losers.
In a complete 180, I decided I must have ALL THE HAIRS.
And then we come to present day, where I’m just a cool guy in a bear hat.
(not) THE END
(via twerknugget)
Eat that pussy and be grateful. There’s starving nice guys in fedoras who don’t have any.
(Source: pegthepatriarchy, via twerknugget)
leaving your room is risky business because you could get asked to do chores, or stub your toe, or get struck by lightning
(via slowkinq)
(Source: y3ll0wcard, via thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg)
i thought i left my ipod in the theater so we went back to look for it and i couldn’t see so i turned on my ipod to give me some light so i could find my ipod do u see where this is goin g because i did not
(via thatsuperawesomeperson)
in case you were wondering
- itching
- lesbian / lezzie
- hooters (hooter is ok)
- lmfao (lmao is ok)
- myspace
- naked
- piss (pissed is ok, urine is ok)
- mate (gets changed to fish)
- queer
- shlong
- suck
- tampon
- testicle
- tit/tits (titties is ok)
- vagina
extra: these words are allowed
- anal
- beastiality
- cock
- crystal meth
- LSD
- narcotics
- opium
drugs are OK, dont be a lesbian
(via slowkinq)
(Source: bethanywoodland, via han-rawr)
